I started having depression in middle school. I didn't know I was depressed at the time. At some point, I started to feel lazy about my friendship, study, and my future. I didn't want to do anything, and I only thought why I had to live like this. Then, as I started this meditation, I learned why I lived with such thoughts. I heard that a person's mind is like a camera. And we live as slaves to the mind pictures. As I listened to the story and meditated, I realized I was really a slave of my mind.
I looked back on my life through meditation. That way, I learned something. When I was young, my parents often told me that you are like a genius. When I was in elementary school, I participated in various competitions. At that time I had high expectations for myself. But when I entered middle school, I realized that there were many friends who were smarter than me. As I became increasingly disappointed in myself, I no longer became interested in studying. I lowered my own value by myself, and I gradually became more and more willing to escape from everything.
Through meditation, I discarded all of my minds. I abandoned what I heard from my parents, big expectations for myself, and my thoughts that undermined my own value by comparing with others. As I gradually abandoned them, those minds really began to disappear. What I realized at the same time was that my value did not necessarily appear only as a test result. I found my true self. I realized that real value eventually exists when I found the Truth inside me. True happiness could also be found in my true mind. Since then, my depression has disappeared. I have found myself the reason for studying. I learned that my report card is only a means to achieve my dream. After that, I started to enjoy studying. Now, thanks to this meditation, I am living the life I wanted. I'm so grateful that I can find Truth inside me.
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